Dealing with Patriarchy and Sexism on Social Media

I was inspired to write this piece because the my first post was apparently rather controversial. It was my family that has given me the push to write this piece. More specifically, my father and uncle. I love them, but it was rather interesting to receive calls from both of them telling me to calm down with my Facebook posts and what I say online. They went along the lines of “We’re concerned for your safety.”

There were so many things that upset me about this, and I hope to address most of them if not all.

First and foremost, I can post whatever the hell I want on my Facebook wall. You don’t like it, then unfriend me. I am an adult. Before I started this blog, I used Facebook as my outlet for social injustice. Nothing I said was incorrect, maybe a little controversial, but nothing incorrect. I use my Facebook to address these issues and spread awareness about them.  In addition, my Facebook does not reflect everything about my life. I can type this very clearly, and I still probably will have left out a few things here or their. My Facebook are my opinions, and as long as my boss (who I’m friends with on Facebook, because I don’t have anything to hide) doesn’t have any issue with what I post, I’m going to keep going with it.

Secondly, Just because I am passionate about something does not make me in a state to calm down. The fucked up patriarchal system expects women to sit down, be quiet, stay their asses in the kitchen, and not speak up about anything that upsets me. Really, asshole? This is the 21st century, and while I am the type of person to cook and clean and shit, that doesn’t mean I am going to let shit that makes me passionate pass me by without saying anything. You should admire my passion, my wokeness. The desire to fight for the rights of my people and other people of color, and instead, you worry about my passion? We are in this state of emergency now because not enough people are passionate.

Thirdly, It’s “dangerous for me to speak about it”? Really? Well my facebook posts haven’t been coming up until I got to college, and nothing has changed. Meaning, I was in danger before and I am still in the same amount of danger, as proven by everything that has happened thus far. I am always in a state of danger. What is me speaking out about the pain of the black community and the pain that I carry every single day going to change? Nothing. And if it does, than I’d much rather speak up and die for what I say than be quiet because I live in fear.

Fourthly, fuck your double standards. Of the family I have on Facebook, I am not the only person who posts about injustices such as these. However I was the only female and told to calm down as a result. So I need to calm down because I’m a girl and I don’t know any better, but because you are males, you can post more inflammatory issues and not need to calm down? Women can do just as much as men, as they often have been in social justice movements. These women often go unnoticed and without the praise and respect they deserve.

Fifthly, my pain is REAL. The uncomforted and fury I have toward these issues are legitimate. Society continues to tell black people and people of color that it is okay for us to continue to get beaten, get killed, and have it justified in the name of just doing a job/ mental illness. I am exhausted. I shouldn’t have to be silent. We have been silent for too long. It has long been time of stand up for ourselves and continue on with this movement.

I love all humans, regardless of your sexuality or gender identity. But I refuse to be told to calm down because you get scared. You want to ride, you ride. Otherwise, get the fuck off my social media.

Let me know if you have experienced something like this as well. As usual, thanks for reading!

-JW

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